Thursday, September 30, 2010

life after death (VI)

spread the ashes of the colours over this heart of mine
bury me in white satin under the peach trees, the same place
where my mother entered into this world, screaming and free
damned into this life by generations of women selfish enough
not to ask their developing fetuses if they wanted to be pushed
and cursed out into blinding cold light and air

carry me to the dried-up river and lay me down in its folds
stroke my hard, pale cheek and brush my dry hair from my face
reform my lips from their grimace to an expression of peace
breathe into me your life, your soul
so that i can cross the styx safely and arrive at the gates of hades
without the sightless stares of the bloodless rending me blind

dress me in white, the colour of innocence and purity
two things i never was, not even in my earliest days out of the womb
humans can never be innocent or pure once they taste
the unforgivable breath of terre or once they swallow the dirt
of life, their lungs heaving
their bones aching with the knowledge of the world

do not forget me yet, grave-digger
keep me in your memory, in one of the unused rooms in your mind
and once in a while, cross the dried-up river and the long horsetail grass
kneel under the peach trees and place a flower on my tombstone
send me hope in the form of a sparrow, to help me cross
the darkness to elysium.

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